Still Struggling

I am having so much trouble staying on plan.  I keep making promises to myself and breking them.  My self-confidence is fading and I don't like the way I look or feel.  I am going to Portland in 4 weeks and I wanted to be 150 lbs.  I am now 174!!!  I am gaining, not losing.  I hate this.  So today is Sunday.  I am blogging to get myself back onthe right track.  I am setting a very high goal for myself rght now.  My goal is to be at 150lbs by 10/22/15.  That is 24 lbs that I need to lose.  I can do it simply by staying 100% on plan.  This means weighing and measuring my portions no more peanut butter, almonds and especially no binges.  I also need to get back to working out.  I am going to get up earlier and ht the gym.  I have to be careful not to overdo it because I now that will stunt my weight loss.  

Hawaii is in 15 weeks.  I want to reach my goal before then.  My goal is 135 lbs.  That is 39 lbs in 15 weeks, 2.6 per week.  I know that if I just stay on plan, it will be done.  

Day 1 AGAIN!

I binged yesterday?  Why?  The only thing that I can think of is that I was feeling sorry for myself because it is that time of the month and I have a wierd canker sore outbreak in my mouth and everything hurts to eat.  Although it was painful, I ate a burrito and cinnabon bites.  Later I had cookies and jelly beans.  I didnt finish the packages and am throwing it all out this morning.  Back on track today.  I am going to reach my goal no matter what.  I can't et this happen again!

Day 4 Today

So far, so good this week.  I'm already done 2.6 lbs since Monday.  I'm doing pretty good sticking to my goals, although I didnt work out yesterday.  Yesterday I didn't eat enough of my lean and green and got hungry later, so I had piece of chicken.  I have a few potential TSFL clients and it's inspiring me to really stay on plan to lose this weight so that I can be a better testimony.  I'd like to lose a total of 35lbs by Thanksgiving.  I got this!

Today's a New Day (again)

On June 26, 2015,  I got a tattoo.  It's a beautiful cross and underneath it says "Today is a new day", and the date.  A year from that date, my daughter and I made  promise to be at our goal weight.  It is 2 months in and neither one of us has lost anything.  The week before last I was on plan and lost about 4 lbs.  Last week was a hard week, I quit my dispatch job and felt like a failure.  I turned to food to comfort me. Then, something wonderful happened.  I was offered a job with perfect hours as an assistant/clerk to my friend Tanya who is a detective.  However, I continued to turn to food.  I binged everday last week.  I gained what I lost right back.  I feel gross.  Tired, frumpy, fat, unhealthy.  On Saturday, Matt and I went to a party.  I was the biggest one out of all of my friends.  Everyone was dressed in really cute outfits, while I wore something flowy that hides my fat.  I hate this feeling, yet instead of motivating me to do something about it, I get caught in this cycle of binging.  Time to break the unhealthy cycle and start on a healthy one TODAY!



In 8 weeks (53 days), I am taking Kristen to Portland for her birthday.  We decided to use this as a goal marker.  My goal is to lose 24 lbs by October 22nd.  I'm feeling motivated.  I would like to be at my final goal by December.  To get to my goal here are a few things that I am committing to:



1. 30 minutes of cardio daily

2. Strength Train 3x per week

3. Drink 86 oz of water daily (10-11 cups)

4. Stay on the 5 &1 plan

5. Measure my lean and green portions

6. Supplements

7. Daily Bible and prayer

8. Blog

9. Use My Fitness Pal

10. Not it for more than and hour at a time.  Get up and move!

Starting Week 11

The past couple of weeks have been quite difficult to say the least!  I allowed the stress of life to get to me and had a tough time staying on track 100%.  However, I weigh 163, so I am 21 1/2 lbs down!! I saw 162.5 the other day, but it didn't stick, so I am sure I will see it again in the next day or so.  I'm hoping andd working hard to get out of the160's this week!  I am still struggling to get my exercise schedule down.  I've been doing my Cardio, Core & More class on Tuesdays and Thursdays and run on Sunday, but haven't been getting enough cardio in through running and cycling on the other days.  I did start reading th Habits of Health again and am getting a ot out of it.  This week, my goals continue to be to workout 6 days, read the Habits of Health and to stay on track with the food!

9 1/2 Weeks

I meant to blog on my weigh-in day, this past Saturday, but had a very busy few days.  So I will start with the celebrations:  I hit the 20 lbs lost mark on Saturday!  Woo hoo!  I also peeked at the measuring tape and am down some more inches.  I'm fitting into more clothes that I haven't been able to wear and feeling great!  Now for the struggles:  It was my moms birthday and I had her over for dinner on Sunday.  She is Vegan, so I wanted to make a dinner especially for her.  Although it was very healthy, it was not on my plan.  As I was trying to figure out what to make, I looked at Pinterest and opened a huge can of worms.  Everything looked so good, but none of it on my plan.  I made the mistake of making thee Milky Way Cupcakes, sine caramel is my moms favorite.  They weren't vegan or healthy.  Not only that, but after church, I had fish tacos!  Sunday I went totally off program.  Monday I paid for it as I had a stomach ache and felt like poop!  Yesterday I worked out in the morning and was hungry all day.  I went off program again!  So, today is Wednesday.  My weight is up a little.  I am committed to this program and am determined to stay on plan.  I am running low on food, my order is supposed to arrive Friday, but I will stick to the 5 & 1 and not waiver!  My goal for the rest of this week is to not only stay 100% on plan, but to also start reading Habits of Health and doing the workbook.

Month 2 Starts Today

18 lbs down, 12 1/2 inches smaller and BMI is 3.29 lower!  My clothes that were tight fit nicely and some even too loose.  I am down a size from when I first started on July 12th.  I feel great, my energy is good.  I have not had any super strong cravings, just fleeting thoughts of candy, pizza or desserts.  I have to say, I have been hungry here and there.  It usually is because I exercised that day or didn't have enough at my Lean & Green meal.  I have stuggled with measuring.  I know that I need to be more diligent about that and my weight loss will probably speed up.  I also have not been consistent with exercise.  So again, my month 2 goals will be to weigh and measure my lean & green portions and to get my exercise in!  Here is my progress pics:

Week 6 Underway

I have lived for the past 5 weeks without any waine, pasta, beans, rice, bread, creamer, or candy...and I have not only survived, but haven't had any major cravings!  I continue to be amazed that my body and mind are changing so much.  I'm down to 168.5, that's 16lbs of fat gone since starting the 5&1 plan and Take Shape For Life.  My mind is transforming by the fact that I went through some stressful things over the past 5 weeks and didn't turn to food or wine.  It didn't even cross my mind.  I've been to Winco several times and didn't buy candy in the bulk section.  I've been out to resteraunts and did not stray.  I'm so excited and believe that I am truly transforming and will not only reach my weight loss goal, but keep the weight off and reach optimal health.  With all this said......



Yesterday was the first time in 5 weeks that I went off plan.  Not because of temptation, but because of necessesity. I had already had my first two meals of the day and headed out with friends for a bike ride.  Well, it ended being a 2 hour ride, 23 miles and I forgot to bring a meal to eat on the road.  I started getting a little lightheaded so a friend gave me a few sports beans.  We got to our destination, Scott's Seafood and that is when I hit the wall, big time.  I felt like I was going to throw up, sweat started pouring and then I got the chills.  The waitress brought the bread and I was determind to not have any.  Actually, I wasn't even tempted.  I was feeling so dizzy and having an outer body experience.  My friends said I was as white a a ghost and my lips turned blue. I asked th waitress to bring orange slices for some quick sugar and my friend told me I had to eat that bread to get those carbs in.  I was desperate to not cause a seen by passing out, so I had some.  I felt better within a few minutes but just couldn't eat my lean and green.  I had 2 pieces of this wonderful sourdough bread.  I called my health coach and she reassured me that I will not gain a bunch of weight or sabotage my efforts.  Just get right bac on plan, so I am.  I weighed this morning and am down half of a pound,  So al that TSFL says about exercise is right on the money.  When on plan, no more than 45 minutes at a moderate intensity.

5th Week Slump

Well, week 5 went well, but I didn't lose any weight.  I'm a little discouraged, but am not giving up!  I feel really good and am going to trust that this week my weight will drop.  Looking back over this past week, I think I can pinpoint a few reasons the scale may not have moved.
I started running 3 days a week and strength training.  I think that possibly the added exercise burned more calories than I ate and my body could be holding onto the fat.  I thought I was keeping my intensity low enough, but there were a few times that I worked out pretty hard.  The other reason my weight may have plateued a little is that I haven't been weighing and measuring my lean & green meals.  So starting today, I am going to be more diligent with that.
Some changes I've noticed is that my clothes are fitting better and some even are a little loose.  My stomach seems a little flatter too.  My energy is still good and my plantar faciatis is gone.
Today is Monday, so I'm actually halfway through my 6th week.  Thursday is my official weigh in day, so for the next 3 days I am going to be strict with my lean & green meals and condiments.  I also am going to be sure to pay attention to my workout intensity.

Live Your Life and Forget Your Age

A few weeks ago I was at a concert in the park at Seal Beach.  With the ocean in the background, a warm breeze in the air and surrounded by friends listening to a great band, I was in a deep reflective mood.  I am not the greatest dancer in the world and I felt a little self-conscisous about getting up and dancing in front of all those people.  So I sat in my beach chair people watching and using the excuse that my knee hurt is why I couldn't dance. Which was true, I am still recovering from a sprained MCL and torn meniscus!
Seal Beach is a really great small beach community with some very friendly people.  I had never been there before but after my very short visit, I want to retire there!  As I looked around at the crowd, many were seniors with beautiful smiles and happy wrinkles around their eyes.  One couple caught my attention though.  They must have been well into their eighties, both a little hunched over, but slim and healthy looking.  The gentleman led his bride to the dance floor and these two lovebirds stayed out there dancing song after song.  She was beaming and he seemed to just cherish this woman in the way he spun her as they danced.  It brought tears to my eyes to see how much fun this couple was having.  When the music died down and the crowd was dispersing, I saw this wonderful couple again.  He was packing up their chairs and she was just dancing away, shaking her hips, hands in the air and a twinkle in her eyes.
Now, a few weeks after my day at Seal Beach, I realize just how much this couple taught me.  I never spoke with them, but their actions spoke volumes to me.  I love to be active!  I love to run, hike, cycle, swim, take long walks and enjoy the great outdoors.  However, to be able to continue to do all of those things well into my golden years, I need to be sure to take care of myself now.  I'm no spring chicken, but I have many more years to live.  Since I entered into my 40's, my body just isn't the same.  It takes forever to recover from injuries, my joints sometimes ache for no apparent reason, my weight won't seem to budge especially in my belly, it's harder to see and sometimes I walk into a room with a purpose just to stand there trying to remember what I came there for!  The beautiful dancing elderly couple had all the same issues but magnified 10 times I'm certain, yet they lived their life as if they were in their 20's.  There are so many things that I want to do - an olympic distance triathlon, the Tough Mudder, travel, climb Half Dome and much more.  So for me, no more wishing...time to really start living and not use age as an excuse to not try new things.
Some other things I learned from that lovely couple is that I can't worry about what others think.  They got up on that dance floor and danced like rockstars.  They were not professional dancers, they just let go and had a ball!  So, join me in this new life mantra...Live your life and forget your age!

My First Month

It has been one month since starting the 5 & 1 Plan with Take Shape For Life and I couldn't be more pleased with my results!  It works!!!  I lost 14 lbs in 4 weeks, 2 inches in my chest, 3 inches in my waist, 2 inches in my hips and 2 inches in my thighs!  I feel so good!  My energy level is high, my sleep is pretty good and my cravings are gone.  There has been some temptations but I was able to resist.  For the most part I haven't been hungry.  The times that I felt hungry, I just ate my meal at 2 hrs instead of 3 or ate a dill pickle or popsicle (optional snacks).  Drinking the water has really helped as well as Powerade Zero.  I started adding exercise in a little and I continue to lose weight.  I am keeping the intensity level pretty low and my weights not too heavy.  My goal for this month is to be more consistent with exercise and to do some sort of cardio everyday.  I am still struggling with being too sedentary when I'm not at work so I need to get moving more.

Ok Month #2 - lets do this!  I want to lose another 14 lbs in the next 4 weeks!

Week 3 Review

This past week was the first week that I had any real feelings of temptation.  I went to Capitola with my mom and kids and had a great day.  However, there were resteraunts, bakeries and ice cream shops all over the place.  I was tempted to have some ice cream, but didn't.  My husband just got home after he spent a week in Idaho visiting his dad.  While he was away, it was eay to prepare my lean and green and have something different for the kids.  With my husband home, it's a little tougher.  I am also feeling a little more stress.  Stress is my trigger to eat sweets.  I will not turn to food to comfort me, but it crossed my mind a few times last week.



I measured myself this morning as well.  In 3 weeks, I have lost 11 lbs, 1 inch in my chest, 2.5 in my waist, 1 in my hips, 1 in my right thigh and 2 in my left.  Woo hoo!  Week 4 here I come!

Week 3 Starts Today

I weighed myself this morning and only lost 1.5 lbs in week 2.  I am a little disappointed but as I reflect back, I think I know why the weight loss wasn't more.  During my first week I was way more active than I was week 2.  I am more sedentary when I'm at home.  So, as I go into week 3, my goal is to get at least 30 minutes of exercise in - light and easy.  Yesterday I walked for 30 minutes and dd a few 2 minute jogging intervals.  It felt great!  Today I went for a long bike ride (1 hr and 15 min).  I am hungrier than usual, so I may have to practice a little willpower.

I measured myself this morning as well and have lost some inches.  So even though the scale didn't show a lot in pounds lost, I am feeling pretty good that I am smaller!  Looking forward to week 3!

12 Days on Program

I still can't believe that I'm not hungry or craving anything!  I had some chicen, zucchini, mushrooms and onion for dinner and am stuffed.  I find it hard sometimes to eat all 6 meals.  I sometimes have to force myself.  With that said, between 1 and 4PM I start thinking about snacking. It's mostly out of habit because I'm not hungry.  The thoughts are fleeting and I haven't even been tempted to go off of my plan.  

Yesterday I did a very light workout.  15 minutes on the stationary bike and some light weights.  It felt good but easy.  I'm trying really hard to stick to what my health coach is tellin me and trust in the process.  So heavier weights will have to wait,

Week 1 Done

Today is day 9 for me being on the TSFL program.  I was out of town and fell behind in my blogging, however, I did bring my scale and lost a total of 7 lbs my first week of doing the 5 &1!!!  This past Wednesday through Sunday I was at te TSFL National Convention.  My Health Coach invited me even before I started the program.  I took a leap of faith and decided to go.  I am so glad tht I did!  I met some amazing people and had a great time.  I learned that TSFL is so much more than just a weightloss company.  In fact, the weightloss part is just one component.  Anyway, over the 4 days, I did not stray off of my plan at all. We went out to dinners, had lunchs provided and plenty of wine.  However, I did not partake.  I ordered to fit into my Lean & Green, didn't drink one drop of wine or sneak a piece of bread.  In fact, I wasn't even tempted.  No craving, no hunger!  I feel great and am ready to keep on losing and become a health coach.  I am so excited to see what happen in the next few months!

TSFL Day 4

My headache is finally gone!!!  Am I in the fat burning state?  I'm not sure yet.  I have to research how I can tell but I certainly hope so.  I don't want to risk having to go through how I felt last few days, so I will stay on track. I was a little concerned yesterday as I went to Mikini's for lunch.  I used that as my Lean & Green, but think I may have had too much fat because I was full afterwards and didn't get hungry for the rest of the day.  I ate my remaining meals anyway and drank 10 glasses of water.  It's still early, but so far today I feel great.  When I woke up, the first few steps didn't hurt (plantar faciatis).  My headache is gone and I don't feel lightheaded.  It seems my energy is up too.  Yesterday I had 2 people say that I look like I've lost weight.  I have lost 5 lbs so far, but I don't think thats enough for anyone to notice.  5 lbs in 3 days - wow!  10 in a week would be amazing! I will keep you posted!

Day 3 with TSFL

Yesterday was tough.  I was never really hungry until my 4th meal - dinner.  I woke up with a terrible headache and felt irritable all day.  The headache got better, but was still lingering.  My husband made his famous pasta last nght and the smell of garlic and onion made me hungry.  I ate leftover grilled chicken, broccoli and a cucumber tomato salad instead of the pasta.  I was so hungry at that point that I didn't care that I wasn't eating what the rest of my family were.  I am not a big drinker, but on the weekends I usually have a few glasses of wine.  My husband offered me a glass but I declined.  He is being supportive but doesn't quite get it yet.  Today is Day 3 and I woke up with a headache again, but not as bad as the one from the past few days.  Trying to plan to eat every 3 hours today will be a bit of a challenge.  I'm trying to eat within 45 mnutes of when I wake up, but I get up at 5:30AM.  Today I am meeting my mom and cousin for lunch at 12:30, and I can't even imagine going more than 3 hours without eating!  So I ate my first meal at 6:30AM, will have my 2nd at 9:30AM and my 3rd, which will be a Lean & Green at 12:30. I have clients and classes tonight, so grabbing a bar will be much easier than eating the lean & green.  I guess it all just works out!

One day down!

Yesterday was my first day on the 5 & 1 Plan.  I liked all of the food that I had.  There was a little bit of an after taste but not too bad.  Of course the food doesn't compare to a good slice of pizza, but I feel it is exacty what I need to stay on track and lose this weight.  I was never hungry but have had a bad headache since yeterday afternoon.  Today is my second day on the program and I will definately stick to the plan!

Take Shape For Life Day 1 Begins

My highy anticipated box of health finally arrived yesterday.  I felt like a little kid on Christmas morning.  I am so excited to start using Medifast and losing this weight, but even more excited to be able to keep it off forever.  You see, a number of years ago I lost 45 lbs and kept it off until the past few years.  The weight slowly crept back on and I am back to where I started 7 years ago.  My weight started to come back right before I got married 5 years ago.  It was a very slow upward climb as I was still incredibly active.  I ran half marathons and did triathlons as well as strength training.  However, between the stress of being newly married and blending families, my exercise started to slow down.  I wasn't burning as many calories.  Then, over the past 2 years or so, I had some injuries that really slowed me down.  I haven't been running due to a torn meniscus and sprained MCL.  On top of that, I have been battling my ex husband and my ex father in law in court for the past 10 months.  I have turned to food to comfort and calm me.  So as I begin Day 1, I am about 50 lbs overweight.  I am not gong to beat myself up, I am going to make a change starting now.

I just finished my very first Medifast meal.  Breakfast was a strawberry shake.  I was a little nervous about drinking it after reading a lot of negative reviews about the products taste.  I have to say, I really liked it.  I love strawberry Quik milk and this tasted a lot like it.  I am full and looking forward to trying all the other products.

Day one has begun!!!

Anxious

     I have been checking the tracking information at least 10 times a day since I placed my TSFLorder.  I can't wait! I hoped it would arrive today, but it looks like it won't be here until tomorrow, so I can't start until Saturday.  I know that it will be really hard to stick to the 5 & 1 plan, but I am ready.  I thought that I should start really eating healthy this week to prepare my body before the drastic calorie cut, but then I think that it will be a long time until I can eat certain foods, so I better get them in!  It's silly, I know, but a struggle!

     Last night I met some friends for dinner.  We get together every month and I love them dearly.  However, I felt so uncomfortable lat night.  I was the fattest one and felt so ugly. One of my friends gave us each some pictures that she took from our last get together and I was shocked at how much bigger I am than the others!  While getting ready to go out, I changed my clothes 3 times.  I feel so unattractive at this weight as well as ashamed.  My feet hurt, I'm tired all of the time and I feel out of control.  I am ready.  Saturday will be my first day and I plan to stick to it 100%.  It will be hard, but not as hard as being a fat personal trainer.  I am ready to lose this weight and never gain it back.  I want to feel good about myself and inspire others. I don't ever want to feel embarressed by my size again.